Good riddance to the DCEU

By the end of the movie “Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom,” it’s pretty clear that the King of Atlantis is about to become a Filet-O-Fish. 

Not because Aquaman (Jasom Momoa) dies or anything like that. But you can tell from every second of the sequel just how disinterested DC Studios is in this film and the future of this character.

It must’ve been a real chore for them to finish the choppy follow-up to the popular 2018 original.

DC heads Peter Safran and James Gunn are hard at work on revamping the entire stumbling franchise, starting with a shiny new “Superman,” but first they had to waste precious time finessing the problem-plagued and oh-so-five-years-ago “Aquaman 2.”

Adding to their headaches, the studio was forced to deal with Amber Heard, who played A-man’s girlfriend Mera in the first film, but is now best known for her pass-the-popcorn Johnny Depp defamation trial. What did director James Wan do? He kept Heard, but gave her character a sidelining injury within the first 40 minutes.

Lazy “Lost Kingdom” is built on such compromises and strict avoidance. For instance, no mention is made of any other DC superheroes, because Aquaman as played by Momoa is obviously about to not be one anymore.   

He might not even be king very long. Now on the throne of Atlantis, Arthur — a k a Aquaman — hates the job, whining, “It’s just meetings all day and politics!” So, he spends half his time on the surface — like an NYC mayor who lives in New Jersey — with his dad, Mera and their new baby, who’s already able to talk to fish. 

The joys of fatherhood are interrupted, though, when David Cane (Yahya Abdul-Mateen II), a k a Black Manta, infiltrates and attacks Atlantis using ancient technology he discovered it the arctic to avenge his dad’s death. 

These old devices are powered by a dangerous element called orichalcum, which is a word the actors utter far, far too many times.

Aquaman, stumped, has to break his imprisoned brother/enemy Orm (Patrick Wilson) out of his cell on land to help defeat Manta. The duo also has to wrestle with the issue of the orichalcum, which is causing “Day After Tomorrow”-style weather patterns and also making insects gigantic for some reason.

“He must be stopped or a global climate meltdown is imminent!,” we’re told.

They are assisted by a super-smart octopus named Topo, who isn’t so much a lovable sidekick as that squid over there.

A confusing subplot is that Manta is possessed by the humanity-hating, evil King of Necrus (of said lost kingdom) after grabbing his nuclear-looking Black Triton. If Manta destroys Atlantis and frees Necrus from his millennia-long enslavement, they could conquer humanity… or something like that.

All of this splashing around continues to take place on a tacky CGI ocean set that would be a better fit for Ariel and Sebastian the Crab from “The Little Mermaid.” 

It’s more glaringly ugly this time, because since the 2018 film, audiences have seen two major blockbusters — “Avatar: The Way of Water” and “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” — in which the ocean actually resembled the ocean. 

Even the flesh-and-blood cast here looks faker than the Nav’i in “Avatar.”

“Aquaman” always had one of the odder ensembles in the DC Extended Universe, with Nicole Kidman-Bot playing Queen Atlanna and Dolph “Ivan Drago” Lundgren as a ginger King Nereus. For some bonus craziness, Martin Short voices a crime boss named Kingfish who is Jabba the Hutt with a snorkel.

But the best thing about the series continues to be Momoa, who for a years has been the only funnyman in DC’s sea of boring barnacles. He will be missed.

“The Lost Kingdom” isn’t well done, but it isn’t miserable either. This same movie has been made countless times before, if less messily. However, what resulted from the many reshoots and edits (Ben Affleck reportedly shot scenes as Batman) is neither an enjoyable standalone film or a useful part of a broader universe. It’s nothing except the final film in the old DCEU.

And to that I say, our long national nightmare is over.