Sterling Shepard repeated the question posed to him as he sat on a stool in front of his locker. He nodded his head and put his hand to his chin, as if trying to find the right words to convey the mixed messages circulating through his brain and his heart.
“How am I handling this?’’ Shepard asked.
“This’’ is a whole bunch of stuff. Shepard loves — truly loves — so much about what his life has been about the past eight years. The interactions with his teammates. Practice during the week. The games. Especially the games. He is preparing to spend Christmas Day with the Giants in Philadelphia, expecting to see little or no action on the turf at Lincoln Financial Field. That pains him, because he feels he can help if given the chance. He knows there are three games remaining in this season, knows he is not signed for 2024 and is absolutely aware that this will be it for him with the Giants and, likely, it for him with the NFL.
“I’m so blessed,’’ the 30-year-old Shepard told The Post. “It’s hard for me to be mad and I definitely can’t be mad at the Giants. I ain’t mad at anybody. It’s hard to say how I feel, I don’t know how to describe it, it’s kinda like up and down but that’s just life and you got to fight through it the best way you can. The way I do it is by enjoying my time with my boys.”
He tries not to think about the finish line, fighting off the thoughts that every day is taking him one day closer to the next chapter in his life. He made a successful return from reconstructive knee surgery and stuck on the roster this year on merit. He also is not naive and realizes his ebullient attitude in 2022, while playing in only three games before landing on injured reserve, convinced general manager Joe Schoen and coach Brian Daboll to give him another shot.
It is not much of a shot. His role is clearly defined: He does not play. The most snaps in one game this season is 26, at Washington. He caught one pass for 5 yards. He was healthy but not on the field, at all, against the Jets and Packers. He played one snap in Buffalo and one in Las Vegas. He played three snaps in last week’s loss in New Orleans. For the season, he has seven receptions for 39 yards. His one and only touchdown came in Dallas, in the closing seconds of a 49-17 loss to the Cowboys.
“It’s tough man, it’s not the ideal situation for me at this point in my career,’’ Shepard said. “You just got to find the blessing in it all and that’s what I try to do every day, try to look at the positives. I’ve had to overcome a lot to still be in this position. If I do call it quits at least I can say I went out on my own terms.’’
He does what he can. There was Shepard, sitting with rookie Jalin Hyatt this week during a one-on-one film session, going over every snap Hyatt played (he did not have a single catch) in the loss to the Saints. Hyatt was upset and Shepard came to his aid.
“He critiqued me and taught me what he would have done if he was in that situation,” Hyatt told The Post. “I have a lot of respect for him and I look up to him. I’m proud that Shep’s on our team.’’
Looking to hook on with another team does not sound like it is high on Shepard’s list.
“I don’t really know what’s out there,’’ said Shepard, who is No. 6 on the Giants’ all-time receiving list with 369 catches — two behind Jeremy Shockey’s 371. “At this point I got to see what’s good for my family more than anything.’’
He has lived in two places in his life — Oklahoma and New Jersey — and confessed, chuckling, “I don’t think I’m going back to Oklahoma any time soon.’’ He plans to stay in the area, which he thinks could help him get into the media. He owns properties in Oklahoma and is considering looking into additional real estate ventures. He enjoys teaching the game and says coaching could be an option for him.
“I just know I’ll be good, whatever I decide to do,’’ he said.
The end is nearing, not exactly the way he hoped it would. The Giants took him in the second round of the 2016 draft and he got paid around $32 million in the eight years. “Shep’’ was never told he had to leave and he never did.
“I love this place,’’ Shepard said. “I love everybody upstairs, they’ve treated me so well my whole career. I’m just very grateful for being in the position I’m in. Not too many people can say they’ve been somewhere for eight years and I realize how special that is.’’
With that, linebacker Isaiah Simmons came by to return Shepard’s boom box and complain about the batteries being low, interplay Shepard adores and realizes will not be available to him much longer.
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